Beckford: LA Bound?
Rating: 5 ("teh sexiest")
Following a humiliating 3-2 loss to expansion San Jose, LA Galaxy boss Alexi Lalas fumed that the Galaxy were not playing "sexy enough," and hinted at a move for supermodel Tyson Beckford: "It's just not sexy enough. We've GOT to bring sexy back. We've got a lot of possible moves to make. Right now, it looks like Justin [Timberlake] isn't available, but we've gotten a lot of interest from Tyson [Beckford]. It's just a matter of time before we're playing the sexiest football in the entire world."
MLS Rumors Rumors consulted noted expert on all things sexy, supermodel Derek Zoolander, who commented that, "Moisture is the essence of wetness, and wetness is the essence of beauty. That's why DC United plays the sexiest football in the league right now. LA needs to play more games during monsoons." When pressed for more, Zoolander continued: "Have you ever wondered if there was more to life, other than being really, really, ridiculously good looking?" When this blogger replied that, no, he hadn't, Zoolander snapped:
Do you understand that the world does not revolve around you and your do whatever it takes, ruin as many people's lives, so long as you can make a name for yourself as an investigatory journalist, no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied along the way, just so long so you can make a name for yourself as an investigatory journalist, no matter how many friends you lose or people you leave dead and bloodied and dying along the way?