27 May 2010

Latest: DC United Seeking Points From Friendly

Kevin Payne, Dave Kasper, and Curt Onalfo have taken issue with MLS over the value of Wednesday Night's match against AC Milan. The DC United management team is wondering why they have not received some compensation in the MLS league standings for their heroic victory over the Italian side. After dropping 8 of their first nine matches, the team is desparate for any and all points that can be assigned.

"You saw our players giving their all against one of the best teams in the world. How can that be for naught?"

When reached for comment, MLS supremo and general ruler of MLSsoccer.com Don Garber may well have said something like:

"They don't know that it is supposed to be a damn show. They think it is a damn fight."

Update: Bradley Speaks About Roster

In looking to address fan's concerns about the 23 man squad selected to travel to the World Cup in South Africa, US National Team Coach Bob Bradley revealed that he was forced to make some selections.

"Look, if FIFA didn't have this number, this 23, I'd have probably only selected 16 or 17 of these guys. Some are clearly make weight."
Guzan: Better pack some Cup O' Soup, because Supper Is For Starters

However, in response to rampant speculation about the specifics, Bradley said only:
"I have no desire to out those individuals that would fall off the team if not required to bring 23. I don't traffic in idle gossip. I'm not a rumor monger. If you want to read that kind of trash, stick to MLS Rumors Rumors. That said, we haven't bothered assigning Robbie Findley a jersey number, and Brad Guzan won't even be issued a uniform at all. Those guys are more than welcome to eat with the team, though...well, breakfast anyway, and maybe lunch. Dinner, they're on their own, because Nike clearly stated that 'Supper is for starters and subs only,' so feeding guys like that, well, it's just not in the budget."

26 May 2010

Breaking: Reaction on Ching

Two US States are in mourning tonight after Brian Ching's exclusion from the US World Cup squad. Texas, the current home of the Houston 1836 Dynamo, where Mr. Ching plays his soccer, and Hawaii, the birthplace of Mr. Ching.

"It is like Bob Bradley personally spat in my face." stated one disgruntled Houston Dynamo Fan.

Speculation on whether Hawaiian Governor Linda Lingle will make a call to another famous Hawaiian, President Barack Obama, is rampant.

"We know that Bob Bradley and some others will be meeting with the Big Kahuna himself. If he could just drop a line, like 'hey, you know that Gitmo is nice this time of year' or 'Why are there no Hawaiians on the team?', maybe Bob will change his mind. Otherwise, Hawaii will have to yet again face the prospect of no representation at the World Cup!"

The front office of the Houston Dynamo should probably say:

"While we are tremendously pleased to have Brian Ching back in our side for our upcoming games, he was really looking forward to the World Cup. We will be toning our orange jersey's to half blinding for the duration of the Cup to honor him. Unless he blows another hamstring or misses a bunch of goals, in which case, we will admit that Bob Bradley does really know all."

Latest: Fans Preparing for Disappointment

US Soccer Fans around the country are eagerly waiting the announcement from National Team Coach Bob Bradley that will send them to the heights of despair. With the 23 man roster for the World Cup announcement at 13:00 (1 PM EDT), fans are stocking up on their quips, hyperbole, and threats of boycott.

In a pre-announcement rant, one fan said:
"I know that he is going to take someone that doesn't deserve to play on my Sunday Rec League side. You know, someone like Bornstein, Torres, or Rogers. Those guys suck! I can do what they do out there!

Other fans were quick to reign him back into control. Saying, "Wait for the announcement, you don't want to get out all your despair too early."

Some fans have taken the extreme position in order to enhance their post-announcement hyperbole.

"I could pick a squad from these guys that would win the World Cup without breaking a sweat. But I doubt that Bob Bradley has the talent or skills to evaluate them properly. He'll end up taking guys that just don't belong and others that won't get selected would shine!

We here at MLS Rumors Rumors of course have the inside scoop on the selection process and have it on speculation that Bradley is purposefully spurning the fans with his 23.

24 May 2010

Breaking: The Special One to ReAL

After last night’s house-warming party in Salt Lake City the Portuguese coach revealed he is set to move permanently to Utah.

ReAL Salt Lake have long sought a coach to match their cosmopolitan setting and Mourinho has long been the man in their sights to lead the club to glory in CONCACAF Champions League play.

After leading Inter to an unprecedented treble of Serie A, Coppa Italia and Champions League titles last night, Mourinho said: "It was difficult to leave Chelsea and it will be sad to leave Inter. Inter is my home in the same way Chelsea was my home. But that’s life, that’s football.

"Now I have two homes, Stamford Bridge and San Siro. And now I will have a third home – probably the Rio Tinto. If you don’t coach ReAL Salt Lake then you always have a gap in your career. Only ReAL are interested in me but I haven’t spoken with anyone and I haven’t signed anything. I promised I’d speak after the final."

Mourinho flew back to Milan to celebrate last night’s triumph with his players, but Inter president Massimo Moratti stayed behind in Salt Lake, probably to thrash out a deal with ReAL boss Dave Checketts. Mourinho said he would talk to Checketts this week.

"The day after tomorrow (I will speak to him)," he said.

"I don’t know the project yet, so I have to hear the project. ReAL is an enormous club, a club that wants the same as me; I want to win, I want to feel important, I want to keep winning."

The Utah media are reporting that a deal is already done, with the Deseret News claiming the Portuguese coach had come to an agreement with ReAL president Dave Checketts on Friday.

The Salt Lake City Tribune, which headlined “ReAL Salt Lake recruits a champion”, said the new coach of the MLS giants would be unveiled on either Tuesday or Wednesday.

The two papers concurred that the length of the contract would be four years, with the former Chelsea coach netting $10 million a season.

Some Inter players could also follow Mourinho to Madrid, according to the papers, notably Brazilian right-back Maicon and Argentinian striker Diego Milito, the former Zaragoza player who scored a brace against Bayern on Saturday.

Mourinho, who also guided Porto to European glory in 2004, follows Ernst Happel and Ottmar Hitzfeld as a member of the select band of coaches to have won the Champions League with two different clubs.