It has come to our attention that God's gift to MLS, the Seattle Sounders, may soon be without a beloved crowd favorite leftover from USL/A-League/various minor leagues of not much note. Through a source (which we will not identify) served by an Ibiza bartender who once scored with Mike's neighbor's daughter while her suburbothug friends flashed gang signs, we have learned that none other than Sebastian LeToux is heading to Benfica.
After doing some digging, we found this item on the Benfica team site. We at MLSRumors² are not such cunning linguists that we can decipher the byzantine Portuguese language, but it seems pretty clear that "Seba" is on his way to the Iberian peninsula. It is not clear if the transfer will go into effect now or in the winter transfer window. Seattle attendance kings will be concerned that the full emotional ejaculation of a possible Open Cup championship will be weakened if this symbol of continuity is not with the team. LeToux would, of course, applaud the 25,000 rave green clad supporters whom will descend upon RFK to show DC United "how its done".
Stay tuned, remember, today's rumor is tomorrow's headline!