01 December 2008

Barca: MLS Miami II Will Be Most Epic Fail Ev-ah!

MIAMI, 1 December 2008: MLS Rumors² recently received an email from a confidential source with ties to Barcelona's MLS expansion bid:
It's, like, gonna be insane. Barca are 100% committed to making this team the most epic fail in the history of epic failure that is professional sports in South Florida. You think you've seen fail before? You think the Marlins' ritual post-World Series fire sales are something? Well, at least they f'ing *won* the Series, even if no one went to their games. MLS Miami II will be the culmination of decades of South Florida fail. They're going to market heavily to the locals of Puerto Rican, Cuban, and Dominican descent, with an ad campaign that calls baseball a sport for [Ed.: rhymes with harrycons]. Then, they're going to spend over $3 million to bring in a washed-up Brazilian, like, say, Ronaldo, who will promptly spend every waking hour either in the clubs or on South Beach, getting fatter and slower by the day. It'll make Lothar's "Rehab on the Riviera" look like serious training.

I'm telling you, it's going to be Epic. Truly Epic.

Stay tuned, dear readers, this is a developing story.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm excited. I love failoramas in sports.

Anonymous said...

YOU AND THIS BLOG ARE STUPID. THE WORSE.

Revelation said...

We aim to please.

EdTheRed said...

@4:43 PM: Thank you for my favorite comment ev-ah. We cherish your readership.

Anonymous said...

Last time I read this blogg.

EdTheRed said...

Dude, no one reads this "blogg" except the people who write it...although I'm sure our many advertisers are quaking in their little boots at the thought of you taking your ball and leaving.

KaptPowers said...

The funny thing is you've probably hit the nail right on the head. This whole fiasco will make Chivas USA look like a GOOD idea.

Revelation said...

Man, people are upset with the blog and this is what they bring? Where is the twenty paragraph diatribe on how our blog made your hard drive download Britney Spear's new album, send your mother a box of coal for the holiday of your choice, and caused your supermodel girlfriend to dump you for Leonardo DiCaprio? I'm not sure whether I'm sad that we only offended two people or that they are so pathetic that they cannot insult us properly.

Agent 009 said...

It says Anonymous left three responses. I think we only offended one person and it took him two times reading through to realize it.

Agent 009 said...

By the way, I am officially changing the spelling of blog to blogg. It's much better.

Color Me Blogg